12 years ago (or so) a bunch of friends and I went to New Orleans for a four-day weekend to celebrate someones a 30th birthday. After a couple of days of heavy drinking it was time to slow it down a bit... so at dinner on the third night I decided water would be my beverage of choice.
Lame, I know. But I was rocking one of those classic two-day New Orleans hangovers. Yea, those drinks may look and taste like Slurpee's but anyone who has been to the French Quarter knows a Hurricane or an Electric Lemonade will sneak up and kick your ass all up and down Bourbon Street.
Years later I would discover a purple thing called the VooDoo - and that's complete and total lights out. I get the large - it does the trick. Then I get another juuuuust to make sure. Thanks for the tip, Chance!
Anyway, back to this dinner... Our waitress at this particular restaurant was a quick wit and extremely funny. She seemed to have a hecklers come-back for everything. And lord know our group was slinging endless attempts at the funny.
I was the last she came to for the drink order and I said, "You know, I think water will be fine for now."
She frowned and in her wonderful cajun accent tried to school me, "Water? Baby, you in N'awlins you need to get to drinkin'."
I explained, "Well, I've been drinking non-stop for two days - I need to start picking my spots."
Without hesitation she busted out, "Honey, like my mama a'ways advised, you keep pickin' them spots they'll never heal."
And all these years later I still use that line every chance I get.