Right around Thanksgiving 2003 my little sister Nancy became bed-ridden. Not by choice mind you - just one day she never got out of bed again. She had the will but her poor little body hadn't the strength anymore.
The weekend before Christmas '03 was my turn to go to Phoenix to keep her company. When I walked into her house I found it strange that it was completely devoid of anything Christmas-y. Nancy ran a successful daycare center out of her home and every year she turned her place into an awesome winter wonderland.
I asked, "How come you don't have your decorations up?"
Nancy replied, "He doesn't want to hassle with it."
He meaning her husband. They were in divorce discussions when she was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer. Nancy was given 6 months to live but managed to fight for an extra 4 years. He was miserable and ready to move on with his life. And he could sense the finish line. But this isn't about him...
I am not much for Christmas but I took one look at her face and could see that she needed that tree set up so I said, "Fuck that. I'm getting that tree and its going right there." I pointed to the corner of her room so that she could enjoy it all day long.
I had no idea the undertaking I had assigned myself. You see, she didn't have uniform decorations for the tree. Every ornament was different and purchased with intent. And each had a story, "We got that one when we went to..." Or, "Grandma got Alec that one when he was born." And so on.
Alec is her son and he and I spent the rest of the day setting up that tree. Proudly. And with flair. Nancy was so happy as memories flowed from her like a fountain of precious liquid gold.
At one point Nancy said, "Don't worry about the angel for the top of the tree - it's too high. I don't want you to fall."
She had high ceilings and the tree was enormous but I was determined to get that angel atop that tree. After all, this was to be the last Christmas tree she would ever see. Yea, I almost broke my neck a few times but eventually I was successful.
She slept for a couple hours. When Nancy awoke she looked at the tree and with a shimmer in her eye she said softly, "Ah, my angel."
I looked at the tree and smiled broadly then she continued with a tear in her voice, "I was talking about you."
I remember that Christmas tree! You were her Angel and Nancy loved you very much. But you already know that. Thinking about that time and all Nancy went threw still makes me cry.
Posted by: Kristina | January 25, 2012 at 10:24 PM