Early yesterday evening I was rushing down the street to get to happy hour. There was a refreshing beer and sassy banter waiting for me. And more importantly my fans hadn't seen me in a few days.
While I waited for a stoplight to change a homeless-ish guy with a big open sore on his upper lip asked me, "Hey, you wanna here a joke?"
I politely denied him confessing that, "I'm in a hurry."
He ribbed me a little, "Who the hell doesn't have time for a joke?"
Ah, logic. I said with a bit of 'do-it-quickly' in my voice, "You're right. Go on ahead - tell your joke."
He smiled and started, "What's is the only thing that Locks of Love and gay men agree on?"
I was a bit confused and asked, "Hold up, what is Locks of Love?"
He replied, "Some hair charity wig shit."
I said, "Oh." Then I continued, "I don't know, what do they agree on?"
Brace yourself, this is his punchline, "Neither will accept anything under 8 inches."
I smiled and said, "That was the joke I missed the light for?"
He said, "You know that was funny."
I smirked, "You are sooooooo stooooooopid."
He pointed at me and replied playfully, "I see you laughing. I know you're gonna go tell that joke later."
I was in fact laughing - but at me... calling him stupid. Hello.
Cut to 30 minutes later and I'm goofing around with my fans beer firmly gripped in my hand when all of a sudden the lame joke teller/open sore hoster walked in looking to see if anyone would share a game of pool. There were no takers so he bounced - but not before some fuss about his shoes. I dunno know what that was about, it was a Brian thing.
Anyway, after he left I told everyone that he had just stopped me on the street to tell me a stupid joke. Curiosity seized Scott who just had to know, "What was the joke?"
I proceeded to tell it and after the punchline flat-lined I said, "I told him he was stupid." Then I continued sheepishly with a confession, "Then he told me that I'd be telling that joke later."
Scott found a satisfying victory in this and wagged his finger at me, "He was right! You just did! Now who's stupid?"